Sunday 22 June 2014

Love me Hate me

It's been minutes, its been days and he is all that I will remember. He takes me away from everything I see and hear and love and hate. He takes me away with a touch of his fingers and his lips and his skin. Feelings mean nothing but the feel of him is everything, overwhelming and peaceful all at once. He is all I could ever want, all I will ever know. An all consuming need for pleasure and pain to fill the space inside me.

His hands are at my throat, and I think that I might hate him. His teeth are at my neck and I know this isn't love. He tears me apart and it's the only time I feel whole.
With a fistful of his hair I pull his face to mine. I taste my blood on his lips and I feel the space where love could be. Choking, whole, hurting, bleeding, needing. He keeps me wanting more, always more.
I gasp when his lips leave mine. I am aching and empty with every heartbeat of space between our lips. He bites down on my ear, my neck, my shoulder.
I bite him back to keep from screaming.
He chokes me harder and I never want him to stop.
But he does, and it's over, and in the morning I will be gone.

I am numb with the distance between us, the chasm neither of us will leap across. Our bodies crash into each other but some part of us never touches. I know this isn't love, but it's as close as I will ever get. Somehow with him it is enough.

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